Voo-Doo Ritual TONIGHT

So you may think I have some big plans for the weekend, but no, I am having a girls night in with my new friend, and based on a conversation the other day, this is what will be happening at my house tonight:

GF: So my sister went to this voodoo lady and she taught her this thing that can tell you how many children you’ll have and what sex they will be.
ME: um-hum – (my last 3 really good girlfriends have all tried to get me to have babies at the same time as them, it’s a weird obsession with my friends)
GF: So next time I see you, I’m going to do it on you and if it says you are going to have a girl. That’s IT!
ME: OK (I’m at the drive thru at Sun Trust and the tellers there always insist on talking to you and stuff, it’s so annoying!)
GF: I’ll just tell your HUBS, that’s it, you guys have to have another baby, we have to have a girl (the truth comes out, she’s has a boy and wants a girl too, not just ALL the time, so she wants to SUCKER me into having a baby for the both of us. I swear I will be like your live in nanny (yeah right)
ME: Well if Mr. X dies I’ll think about it
GF: Who’s Mr. X?
ME: Mr. X is the HUBS boss, if he dies I am sure The HUBS will get a promotion and then I can quit and become a FULL-TIME BLOGGER *ahem* I mean a STAY AT HOME MOM

Maybe I should start a FUND all the people who want me to have another baby (my youngest is 17) can send me MONEY, that way I can be a SAHM, only you have to hurry, I am 37, um, I mean 21!

I can also start a 2nd FUND, all the people who DON'T want me to have another baby can send me MONEY and when the last baby goes off to college (2 years) I can take that money and travel all over the world in great luxury (I'll blog about it of course!)

Either way, I'm keeping ALL the MONEY!

Shot Gun Wedding!

There was nothing funny leading up to my wedding. Really, I was 18 and was supposed to be packing to go to Emerson College in Boston, not getting married in El Salvador (where my parents were stationed at the time) to a Guatemalan, who was 23 and my parents had met once before we told them I was pregnant. Not fun, not funny....after much crying and fighting, the parents agreed that I would marry. At City Hall, no celebration. I cried some more. OK, at a Church, no celebration, you can't wear white (my Mother's words) I cried and threw up (the morning sickness was killing me) FINE! In a Church, in a dress, small reception at the house. And so it was. I knew that everyone thought it was a joke, I knew everyone thought I would have a "real" wedding in 5 or more years down the road (with a kid from a previous relationship.) One of my sisters didn't even come! People just didn't think it was happening or maybe thought it was like when I wanted to learn Karate (lasted 2 weeks) or maybe when I wanted to learn piano (last 2 months) they thought I was a kid. Yes, I was 18, but you know what, so was my Mom when she got married and she has been married for 50 years.

So, guess what, it was my only wedding, it was my real wedding, August 31, 1990. My wedding was what I could plan in 3 weeks with $2000, so it wasn't much, but I dream of re-newing our vows with a crazy, fairy tale wedding surrounded by all our friends and family! The actual wedding was pretty funny, as are most events in my life...here are some highlights:

• I was sick as a dog with the flu and was too afraid to take any medicine, because I was preggers.


• By the last fitting the dress barley fit, I had to wear this contraption under it that had wire and spandex, it was so bad I could not sit down. The fact that my unborn child survived those undergarments is a miracle itself!


• My husband was late to Church, it was his sister's fault, they were sharing a ride and she is late to EVERYTHING.
• I had to keep circling around and around in the car waiting for him to arrive and get to the altar before I could get out. My Dad got out of the car and went to find out what was going on. My God Father got in the car. His name is "Guido" and it suits him perfectly. He offered to maim my future husband several times, actually maim was the best case scenario in his eyes. To this day, I don't think he was kidding.
• I cursed him out at the alter and pinched him hard. He was so apologetic.
• There is a rosary that has been in my husbands family for generations, it is placed around the couple to bind you together (some people do a ribbon or rope.) The HUBS has big ears and when my cousin Lisa placed it around us she left one end dangling on the Hubs ear! Everyone laughed (see picture below)


• When the priest asked my husband the I DO part, a pack of street dogs started howling in front of the Church, like a bad movie. Everyone laughed.


• The party was mostly my parents and their friends and they all got wasted, some ended up in the pond in the back yard. I was stone cold sober and had the worst flu ever.


• When we got to the Hotel Room, we ordered hot tea, lemon juice, saline water and cold medicine from room service (HUBS was sick too) We took it and went to bed.


• At 3 am our friends were pounding on the hotel room door (to this day I don't know how they figured out where we were) They are yelling stupid stuff like- What are you doing in there? You getting it on? Needs some condoms...hahaha, guess not!


• At 3:03am, I called Security and said that some crazy people were in the hall, and went back to sleep.

My father walked me down the aisle

The rosary stuck on over sized ear.

In parents backyard after the wedding.




Leaving my parents house for the hotel.



Our 20th wedding anniversary will be on 8/31/2010, I may have a 80's theme re-newal of the vows, very "Wedding Singer", y'all can come fo 'sho!


Thanks for the memories and your wedding carnival, Three Boy- One Mommy!

Meme- I was tagged

I've been tagged by Piece 'o Coconut Cake!Here are the Rules:1.Link to the person that tagged you2.Post the rules on your blog3.Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself4.Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs5.Let each random person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website.6.Let your tagger know when your entry is UP.

oh, randomness, where art thou....

1. I held on to a pair of size 4 Guess Jeans for 20 years, just in case they ever fit again, they are acid wash.

2. If I could fit my large, arroz con pollo thighs and Iris Chacon ass in those jeans, I would wear them every day, acid wash and all.

3. My godfather, a good friend of my father's actually offered to "get rid" of my husband when my father told him I was pregnant and getting married, I was 18. I found this out 5 years ago.

4. I have lived in 7 countries and 3 different states, I moved every 2 or4 years as a child. I get sudden urges to change jobs or move homes every 2 to 4 years. The nomad in me doesn't go away.

5. I want to be a Flight Attendant when my youngest goes to college, in 2.5 years (this is not a joke) or I will find a job in Dubai for a 3 year contract (one of these 2 will happen)

6. I was once a singer in a pop group with a #1 hit, this was in Central America, so I don't think it counts as much,as like being Tiffany or something. Since I moved so much, I have no pictures or video, or even recordings. I did however find some newspaper clipings, just in case one day I have to prove it.

I have no one to tag, becasue my sister stole them all....very sucky!

1. Hot Wheel Mama- she's one hot mama!
2. Posey- she is SOOOO charming!
3. Happy Hour Sue- I'm obsessed with her, she is up with w/ Tina Fey funny!
4. Jamey- because she is crafty!
5. Mrs. 4444- her car full of beer was the best pic ever!
6. Jen- the ultimate Mom-ultimate!