Thursday, August 21, 2008

Evil Step Sisters

Hey people, there are 3 stories that truly capture the evilness of the step sisters. OK, they are my real sisters, and they are no longer evil, they must have been exchanged by Aliens at some point too, because now they are nice. I will only release one sad story at a time, because I am sure, if I tell you them all at once, the evil step sisters might get death threats and such. Of course, there is no recollection whatsoever of any of the stories I am about to share, except for me, the affected party. The sisters have selective memory and the parents deny. I am the baby, they are 6 & 7 years older than I am, and well, we all know the baby is always the favorite, dare I say that's why they were not nice.

I think I was 6 years old, my parents went out to some party and left my oldest sister in charge. No sooner had they left, the evils decide to tell me that I was adopted. Not regular "you're adopted" mean stuff you tell your little sister, no, your Mom is......"doot-do-roo" (that's suspenseful music) Pepper! Pepper? Yes, the springer spaniel, our pet is your real mother. WTF? Well, of course my response was "na-uh, am not" These are a list of the facts that were presented to me by the evils:
  • Mom and Dad found Pepper on the side of the road and brought her home
  • weeks later you were born, a strange creature, but the cleaned you up and decided to raise as there own, sisnce they thought you were cute & since they felt sorry for you
  • They were done having kids, why would they wait 6 years to have another baby?

and last but no least the HARD evidence...they brought out all the picture albums, and apparently my Dad must have got Pepper around the time I was born, because they showed me picture after picture of Mom, Dad and the two evils, then....all of a sudden in every picture was Mom, Dad, the two evil, me and the damn dog! I was 6 and obviously gullible. So I was promptly kicked out of the TV room and told to go be with my Mom!

When my parents came home late that night and asked my sister's where I was and everyone had to look for me, I was with Pepper in the dog house fast asleep. I vividly remember crying and telling the dog "waaaaa, you're the only one who loves me, I always knew you were my mommy, waaaaaaa" the dog licking the tears on my cheeks...What can I say I was a huge drama queen!

4 comments:

  1. What a load of CRAP and/or a desperate need for attention! Love, your big sis

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  2. Please ignore everything Evil StepSister #1 says.

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  3. LMAO That story is great! Your mother Pepper......only you I swear.

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  4. Evil, pure evil!!!! I totally did the same thing to my poor brother. I think he's still scarred.

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I love you Darling, really! Thank you!