Why I need a JOB

So I have been unemployed since January 1st of this year. To say it sucks is so beyond an understatement, it redonkculous.

So I have come up with a few reasons why I really, really need a job.

1. I NEED money! I was never a stay at home Mom (could not afford to be) Never worked to pay off my charge cards or as a "fun" thing to do. I worked because I have always needed the money, still do.
2. Being unemployed at the same time I went from having 3 boys at home to only having 1 boy at home is the most depressing thing ever. Suffering empty nest syndrome and unemployment at the same time is shitty. My one remaining son goes to school full time, has a job, works out everyday and has a car, which means I see him twice a month, usually the day before he gets paid and is broke.
3. I have started watching HSN & QVC. I am days away from ordering a GenieBra, an ABRocker, and that shit Cindy Crawford uses on her face.
4. I can recite word for word every episode of Ice Loves Coco and I seriously love her.
5. My husband comes home for lunch every day becasue he wants to make sure I have not gone crazy, got out of bed, and actually took a shower.
6. Since I have no children to care for or dot on, I have become unnaturally obsessed with my dogs. Seriously, I am sure if I could breastfeed my puppy, I probably would, and well even I know that is JUST WRONG.
7. All I do all day long is EAT.
8. As much as I know the job market sucks, blah, blah, blah, sending 100 resumes out and not getting a single call back makes me feel like a BIG Loser, and not in a good way like the stupid weight loss show.
9. Sitting at home all day only makes me see how much my house sucks. I need new appliances, need new counter tops, need to remodel my bathroom, etc, etc, etc
10. Being unemployed gives me writers block.